Something I Ate Today

I just had a milkshake that was too milky and insufficiently mixed, so there were still icy ice cream pebbles. It was all the worst parts of milk and the only bad parts of ice cream.

When I went upstairs to dump it out, the kitchen sink was full of dishes, so I took it to the bathroom. As my wrist was rotating to dump the thing, I realized this flavor (Pistachio) was full of nuts (Almonds, surprisingly) which wouldn't go down the drain. And the toilet, which would have happily accommodated the mixture, was mere inches away. But by the time all of that gelled in my mind, it was too late. So I rinsed down the green and scooped the nuts out of the sink.

Thanks for nothing, Baskin-Robbins.

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^ Title of my autobiography.

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Then I had a beer and a multivitamin.

That concludes the latest feature, "Something I Ate Today."